“Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live,” John 11:25

It’s obviously not Easter Sunday anymore but writing back on it, Easter Sunday is the day Jesus rose from the dead. The truth is, as much as I try to have faith in Faith, I often find myself feeling quite the hypocrite because I know next to nothing about the Bible apart from the very basics. I don’t go to church regularly. I don’t pray regularly. I don’t attend Bible study classes at all. I have hardly any Christian friends.

Sometimes, I feel like learning more about the scriptures and how I might be able to build a close, intimate relationship with God but I find it such a struggle to do that with the intangible. Yet, it is ironic then, that I have managed to create such a tight bond with the ED, which is equally intangible. Perhaps the ED has blocked out the voice of my faith and turned it into nothing more than a hushed whisper.

My weight has been stagnant about a month now and I feel myself trying to hold back once more. The reality of it is all in my head though – stop trying and I stop living. The world will continue to spin, and while my life goes back on hold, no one else’s will, least of all Flo’s. I can’t let ED win.

While I struggle in holding onto God, I still believe He is real, and that He loves me, but doesn’t necessarily love the things that I do. I believe that as able as He is to create life from the mere mixture of flour and water i.e. flour+water=culture (think: sourdough), He will be able to help me rise above ED and thrust me into the life He has planned for me.

So the mention of flour and water probably sounded quite random, but I threw that analogy in because the making and baking of bread has always mind-blown me in that the yeast that enables batter to rise is actually a living thing. Even dried yeast, when activated, comes back to life.


On Sunday, I decided that bread itself, represents life and I needn’t bake the traditional Easter Breads, as delicious as they are. My family on the most part, tends to shy away from sweet breads although once in a while, we do enjoy a thick slice of buttery brioche. A large loaf of Easter Bread however, might take us a while to finish, so instead, I decided to do a simple Oatmeal Sandwich Loaf using Coconut Milk.


Coconut Milk Oatmeal Sandwich Loaf

240g Coconut Milk
42g Unsalted Butter
100g Rolled Oats
60g Water
240g Bread Flour
30g Brown Sugar
7g Instant Yeast
1g Salt

  1. Heat coconut milk with butter and pour over rolled oats. Stir and let sit 5min before adding in the water.
  2. Make sure the oat mixture is about 60deg C. Then add yeast into the oat mixture and leave to stand another 10min.
  3. In a mixing bowl, place bread flour, sugar and salt. Add wet mixture in and stir together. You can use a dough hook to knead on low for about 5min, or you can knead lightly by hand until you get a uniform mixture.
  4. Place dough into an oiled bowl, covered lightly with clingwrap or a damp towel. Leave in a warm place to prove for about 1 hour or until doubled in size.
  5. Punch down the dough and knead for a few minutes before shaping it. Place into greased loaf tin and allow to prove a second time – 30min or until doubled in size.
  6. Bake at 175deg C in a preheated oven for about 30min.
  7. Allow the bread to cool in its tin for about 10min before removing to cool completely.

You may even want to consider spreading cinnamon sugar, or Nutella, or even a savoury pesto on the dough just before you roll it up to prove in the loaf tin prior to baking. Only if you’re feeling a little dangerous of course!

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This bread is ever so slightly sweet and amazingly soft. I’ve had it with cheese and a runny egg on top but I find that it’s even better at the breakfast table paired with a sumptuous nutty spread or citrus marmalade. Especially when eaten fresh, it doesn’t need to be toasted so even the little ones, and the older folk, will be able to devour this loaf with ease!

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